Roughly 6 months after I met Mike, he confessed to me that he had made up his own holiday. He even named it after himself. He named it Mikukkah. If you're thinking that sounds a lot like Hanukkah, that's because Mike stole the menorah from Hanukkah, and put it to use in his own fake holiday.
He says he made up Mikukkah when he was dirt poor in college, as a way of making time to spend with friends. the dirt poor part is accommodated by the convenient Mikukkah tradition of giving extremely inexpensive gifts to those you celebrate with. Mike lights the stolen menorah (all of the candles), and says that you hang out with friends until the candles burn themselves out.
So every year since then, we've gotten some friend to humor Mike and come hang out for the fake holiday. This year, we invited our new Iraqi friends, Moog & Marwa, to come over and celebrate Mikukkah with us. We made dinner and hung out with them for a while - of course we had to explain Mike's fake holiday across a language barrier. (it's a good thing Moog's English is soooooo good!)
As we were getting ready for dinner, Mike turns to me and tells me I should look up online to see if we're missing any Mikukkah traditions. That's right - Mike actually asked me to Google his fake holiday and see if we were forgetting anything. when I pointed this fact out to him, he claimed that his fake holiday could easily be spreading and evolving, and i better check Wikipedia in case something new had evolved and become part of the holiday that he wasn't aware of.
Later that night I asked him what he was doing - then asked if he was Googling Mikukkah. He wasn't, but that immediately reminded him that he hadn't done it yet, and so (of course) he set out to Google his own fake holiday. Of course he didn't find any hidden secret sect of people planning out special new Mikukkah traditions. But he DID find some guy on Facebook named Mikaka (or something like that). He said he was going to try to friend the guy and tell him all about Mikukkah.
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
Monday, December 12, 2011
The Mike Stories, Pt. 35
just now...
Chrissy: What are you doing?
Mike: I was going out to the garage.
Chrissy: Why?
Mike: I was going out there to do more organizing.
Chrissy: What?!! That's obviously a lie. I know how you "organize" - you're like the anti-organizer. you're probably going out there to make a mess!
Mike: yeah!
Chrissy: I knew it!
Chrissy: What are you doing?
Mike: I was going out to the garage.
Chrissy: Why?
Mike: I was going out there to do more organizing.
Chrissy: What?!! That's obviously a lie. I know how you "organize" - you're like the anti-organizer. you're probably going out there to make a mess!
Mike: yeah!
Chrissy: I knew it!
Monday, October 10, 2011
The Mike Stories, Pt. 34
This evening I went in to do some laundry. I got the machine going, dumped in a few pieces of dirty laundry, then reached up into the cupboard for the laundry detergent.... and found none. Instead I found two big jugs of liquid fabric softener (which we don't use)...
so I called Mike and asked if he could pick up some laundry detergent on the way home. He says: "why?! we have tons of it!"... um, no we don't. we have tons of liquid fabric softener, mister.
(guess who gets to stay up late to make sure my clothes get into the dryer, so i have something to wear tomorrow?)
so I called Mike and asked if he could pick up some laundry detergent on the way home. He says: "why?! we have tons of it!"... um, no we don't. we have tons of liquid fabric softener, mister.
(guess who gets to stay up late to make sure my clothes get into the dryer, so i have something to wear tomorrow?)
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
The Mike Stories, Pt. 33
A conversation from this evening:
Chrissy: I think I might go draw again in the morning.
Mike: You're going jogging in the morning?
Chrissy: ha! If I ever say anything like that, you should question my sanity!
Mike: What did you say then?
Chrissy: that I might go drawing again in the morning!
Mike: jogging sounded like more fun.
Chrissy: no it didn't, and that's not going to happen!
Mike: yeah, you could get like a '70's jogging suit!
Chrissy: that's not going to happen unless it's for Halloween!
Mike: and you should get a headband!
Chrissy: I am not jogging!
Chrissy: I think I might go draw again in the morning.
Mike: You're going jogging in the morning?
Chrissy: ha! If I ever say anything like that, you should question my sanity!
Mike: What did you say then?
Chrissy: that I might go drawing again in the morning!
Mike: jogging sounded like more fun.
Chrissy: no it didn't, and that's not going to happen!
Mike: yeah, you could get like a '70's jogging suit!
Chrissy: that's not going to happen unless it's for Halloween!
Mike: and you should get a headband!
Chrissy: I am not jogging!
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
The Mike Stories, Pt. 32
Mexican Edition: Spanish Mike & the Quest for Tequila
-miércoles-
on Wednesday, we planned to go to the tequila distillery and then the Pacifico brewery. What better than a day of alcoholic beverages on vacation in Mexico, right? We didn't know what to expect, except that relying on Mike's Spanish was likely to take us on a tour of the bars of Mazatlan before landing us at the tequila factory.
so after breakfast, Mike asked our waiter if he knew how we could get to the tequila factory. He appeared to know, and flagged down a taxi for us, and told the taxi driver where we wanted to go. all seemed to be going considerably easier than we could have imagined... then the taxi driver pulled over in front of a building right downtown, right across the street from the beach. Mike and I exchanged a wary glance, we paid the taxi fare, and headed into the building. Turns out Mike's Spanish had gotten us to a liquor store!
Undaunted (and a little humored), Mike asked the lady working at the liquor store about the tequila factory. She gave us a sad little nod and told us that there was no tequila factory in Mazatlan. Confused and disappointed, we decided to head over to the Pacifico brewery. This time the taxi ride was easy, and uneventful. We arrived at the Pacifico brewery without any trouble. Once there, however, we learned that we had to schedule a tour in advance, and that the next time available would be on Friday. So we booked a tour for Friday, and headed back to the beach where we started. We hit up one of our favorite little restaurants for a cerveza. We thought we might as well end the adventure with a beer.
While at the restaurant, I convinced Mike that I was sure I had seen online that you could visit a tequila distillery in Mazatlan, and had him ask our friendly waiter about it. (visiting the friendly waiter was actually why we liked that particular restaurant - he was a really nice guy!)... so Mike asked, and our waiter told us that we could indeed visit Los Osuna, a tequila distillery to the north. I believe it is a bit outside of Mazatlan, which perhaps explains why the liquor store worker didn't think to tell us about it. Our waiter proceeded to tell us that we could go down the street a couple of doors to a travel agency and book a tour. He told us that would be the best/cheapest way to get there. We thanked him, and did exactly that after the our afternoon cerveza.
-jueves-
our tour for the tequila distillery was set for Thursday, however, when Mike woke up that morning he wasn't feeling well. He had eaten something the previous day that gave him stomach trouble. We had both really been looking forward to seeing how tequila is made, and so I didn't want to go without him. I went downstairs to try to phone the tour company to reschedule our tour, but the office wasn't open yet. Our wonderful hotel host offered to continue calling for us, and to reschedule the tour for us so I wouldn't have to spend my morning on the phone. I asked him to try to reschedule it for Saturday for us. It was really very sweet of him. Mike spent the day recovering at the hotel, and I wandered around exploring the old section of Mazatlan, and relaxed by the pool with a good book.
-viernes-
After a late breakfast on Friday, we headed back over to the Pacifico brewery for our tour. Another group was scheduled to take the tour with us, but didn't show up. We ended up taking a private tour of the brewery! The tour was awesome! I've been on brewery tours in the US before, but it was a whole different experience in Mexico. They allow you to get a lot closer to the factory workers (close enough to touch the bottles on the conveyer belts if you really felt like it!). I highly recommend trying to take a brewery tour if you find yourself in Mexico!
-sábado-
After breakfast on Saturday, we headed back over to the travel agency to make sure we were in the right spot to meet our tour guide. The travel agent informed us that our tour had been canceled for that day, and that we could reschedule for Monday if we wanted (except we were scheduled to fly home on Sunday). Totally disappointed, we went to do a little shopping. Then Mike flagged down a taxi driver and asked him if he knew where we could do a zipline canopy tour. He sure did! He told us we could do one out of the city a bit, to the north - AT THE TEQUILA FACTORY! Jose was one crazy driver, but we were happy to hire him for the day. Not only did we finally get to do the tour of the tequila factory, but we also got to do another great zipline canopy tour!
Spanish Mike's quest for tequila really did turn out to be an adventure!
-miércoles-
on Wednesday, we planned to go to the tequila distillery and then the Pacifico brewery. What better than a day of alcoholic beverages on vacation in Mexico, right? We didn't know what to expect, except that relying on Mike's Spanish was likely to take us on a tour of the bars of Mazatlan before landing us at the tequila factory.
so after breakfast, Mike asked our waiter if he knew how we could get to the tequila factory. He appeared to know, and flagged down a taxi for us, and told the taxi driver where we wanted to go. all seemed to be going considerably easier than we could have imagined... then the taxi driver pulled over in front of a building right downtown, right across the street from the beach. Mike and I exchanged a wary glance, we paid the taxi fare, and headed into the building. Turns out Mike's Spanish had gotten us to a liquor store!
Undaunted (and a little humored), Mike asked the lady working at the liquor store about the tequila factory. She gave us a sad little nod and told us that there was no tequila factory in Mazatlan. Confused and disappointed, we decided to head over to the Pacifico brewery. This time the taxi ride was easy, and uneventful. We arrived at the Pacifico brewery without any trouble. Once there, however, we learned that we had to schedule a tour in advance, and that the next time available would be on Friday. So we booked a tour for Friday, and headed back to the beach where we started. We hit up one of our favorite little restaurants for a cerveza. We thought we might as well end the adventure with a beer.
While at the restaurant, I convinced Mike that I was sure I had seen online that you could visit a tequila distillery in Mazatlan, and had him ask our friendly waiter about it. (visiting the friendly waiter was actually why we liked that particular restaurant - he was a really nice guy!)... so Mike asked, and our waiter told us that we could indeed visit Los Osuna, a tequila distillery to the north. I believe it is a bit outside of Mazatlan, which perhaps explains why the liquor store worker didn't think to tell us about it. Our waiter proceeded to tell us that we could go down the street a couple of doors to a travel agency and book a tour. He told us that would be the best/cheapest way to get there. We thanked him, and did exactly that after the our afternoon cerveza.
-jueves-
our tour for the tequila distillery was set for Thursday, however, when Mike woke up that morning he wasn't feeling well. He had eaten something the previous day that gave him stomach trouble. We had both really been looking forward to seeing how tequila is made, and so I didn't want to go without him. I went downstairs to try to phone the tour company to reschedule our tour, but the office wasn't open yet. Our wonderful hotel host offered to continue calling for us, and to reschedule the tour for us so I wouldn't have to spend my morning on the phone. I asked him to try to reschedule it for Saturday for us. It was really very sweet of him. Mike spent the day recovering at the hotel, and I wandered around exploring the old section of Mazatlan, and relaxed by the pool with a good book.
-viernes-
After a late breakfast on Friday, we headed back over to the Pacifico brewery for our tour. Another group was scheduled to take the tour with us, but didn't show up. We ended up taking a private tour of the brewery! The tour was awesome! I've been on brewery tours in the US before, but it was a whole different experience in Mexico. They allow you to get a lot closer to the factory workers (close enough to touch the bottles on the conveyer belts if you really felt like it!). I highly recommend trying to take a brewery tour if you find yourself in Mexico!
-sábado-
After breakfast on Saturday, we headed back over to the travel agency to make sure we were in the right spot to meet our tour guide. The travel agent informed us that our tour had been canceled for that day, and that we could reschedule for Monday if we wanted (except we were scheduled to fly home on Sunday). Totally disappointed, we went to do a little shopping. Then Mike flagged down a taxi driver and asked him if he knew where we could do a zipline canopy tour. He sure did! He told us we could do one out of the city a bit, to the north - AT THE TEQUILA FACTORY! Jose was one crazy driver, but we were happy to hire him for the day. Not only did we finally get to do the tour of the tequila factory, but we also got to do another great zipline canopy tour!
Spanish Mike's quest for tequila really did turn out to be an adventure!
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
The Mike Stories, Pt. 31
The following is an example of a recurring conversation that happens a lot at our house. (substitute the olives in this case for just about anything you can imagine that I might be using)
Mike (taking one of my olives): "See? I'm sharing!"
Chrissy: "Sharing doesn't mean what you think it means."
Mike: "Yes it does. I'm a good sharer!"
Chrissy: "you're thinking of 'taking'"
Mike: "no, I'm sharing"
Chrissy: "no, you're stealing"
Mike: "but I'm a good sharer"
Chrissy: "no, you're a thief"
Mike: "but I'm sharing"
Chrissy: "that's not sharing."
Mike: "no... it's sharing"
Mike (taking one of my olives): "See? I'm sharing!"
Chrissy: "Sharing doesn't mean what you think it means."
Mike: "Yes it does. I'm a good sharer!"
Chrissy: "you're thinking of 'taking'"
Mike: "no, I'm sharing"
Chrissy: "no, you're stealing"
Mike: "but I'm a good sharer"
Chrissy: "no, you're a thief"
Mike: "but I'm sharing"
Chrissy: "that's not sharing."
Mike: "no... it's sharing"
Thursday, July 21, 2011
The Mike Stories, Pt. 30
Last night I came into the bedroom, ready for bed... and found the bed completely missing sheets, blankets, and pillows. I asked Mike if he was changing the sheets, and he comes wandering out of the bathroom saying "maybe - you don't know!" After reminding him that's why I was asking (duh), he muttered something about going to get sheets, and left the room. He returned 5 minutes later with a package of new socks, stuck them on the dresser, and started wandering around the room.
At that point, I told him "Hey! those aren't sheets!"
he said "oh yeah" and left the room again. Then he came back with sheets from the dryer that weren't actually dry yet, and tried to put those on the bed. After telling he I wanted DRY sheets, he left the room again, and finally came back with an acceptable set of sheets. Third time's the charm, I guess!
At that point, I told him "Hey! those aren't sheets!"
he said "oh yeah" and left the room again. Then he came back with sheets from the dryer that weren't actually dry yet, and tried to put those on the bed. After telling he I wanted DRY sheets, he left the room again, and finally came back with an acceptable set of sheets. Third time's the charm, I guess!
The Mike Stories, Pt. 29
We have been taking our dog, Morpheus, to nosework classes for several months now. He's learning how to use his nose to find various things. He started out finding freeze-dried liver dog treats, and he's worked his way up to finding q-tips scented with birch and anise. He's gotten really good at it, and in class he's working on finding two scents during the same search.
So with that in mind, yesterday Mike was looking for his keys (which happens often - he hasn't settled on a single place in the house where they "belong" so they end up wherever he happens to set them down. sometimes that means they get stuck way down in the couch cushions or worse). During yesterday's key hunt, Mike told me that we should teach Morpheus how to find our keys. That sounded like a great idea to me - since Mike sometimes also hides my keys. I told him we should use a different scent for our keys than we use for nosework class - and in fact that we should probably use a scent we're unlikely to use in nosework class to avoid confusion. Potentially even a different scent for my keys than for Mike's keys, and different search words so he knows what he's after when we tell him to find them.
Next Mike got technical about the whole thing. He started talking about how we would have to go get a pouch to hold the scent, so I told him it shouldn't be hard to just sew one. (honestly I was surprised he didn't jump straight to making it himself. He wants to make everything himself lately, from curtains to back-yard furniture, to clothing and dog toys). Once he realized that a small pouch for his key chain was totally feasible to make, he got really excited and started talking about scents. First he wanted to use a different scented oil, and I reminded him that he'd have to be careful about 2 things: it shouldn't be a scent that we might use in class, and it shouldn't be a scent that would be commonly found around our house. After suggesting oregano (and getting shot down since that's definitely common in our kitchen), he got all excited and suggested patchouli. At this point he told me that we need to take Morpheus to a hippie store so we can get cones of patchouli incense to attach to our keys. he swears that if we just use the whole cone, our keys will smell like patchouli forever.
(can't you just see our giant hippie dog running around the house searching for our patchouli scented keys the next time Mike loses them?!)
So with that in mind, yesterday Mike was looking for his keys (which happens often - he hasn't settled on a single place in the house where they "belong" so they end up wherever he happens to set them down. sometimes that means they get stuck way down in the couch cushions or worse). During yesterday's key hunt, Mike told me that we should teach Morpheus how to find our keys. That sounded like a great idea to me - since Mike sometimes also hides my keys. I told him we should use a different scent for our keys than we use for nosework class - and in fact that we should probably use a scent we're unlikely to use in nosework class to avoid confusion. Potentially even a different scent for my keys than for Mike's keys, and different search words so he knows what he's after when we tell him to find them.
Next Mike got technical about the whole thing. He started talking about how we would have to go get a pouch to hold the scent, so I told him it shouldn't be hard to just sew one. (honestly I was surprised he didn't jump straight to making it himself. He wants to make everything himself lately, from curtains to back-yard furniture, to clothing and dog toys). Once he realized that a small pouch for his key chain was totally feasible to make, he got really excited and started talking about scents. First he wanted to use a different scented oil, and I reminded him that he'd have to be careful about 2 things: it shouldn't be a scent that we might use in class, and it shouldn't be a scent that would be commonly found around our house. After suggesting oregano (and getting shot down since that's definitely common in our kitchen), he got all excited and suggested patchouli. At this point he told me that we need to take Morpheus to a hippie store so we can get cones of patchouli incense to attach to our keys. he swears that if we just use the whole cone, our keys will smell like patchouli forever.
(can't you just see our giant hippie dog running around the house searching for our patchouli scented keys the next time Mike loses them?!)
Saturday, April 23, 2011
The Mike Stories, Pt. 28
I'm not Catholic, but I like pretending I am, and so I gave up sweets this year for lent (which has worked out great - it's been a great excuse for when I DON'T really want to accept someone's nice gift of donuts and cupcakes at work)... but I have definitely missed Easter candy this year. Easter candy is fantastic! And so - tomorrow is Easter, which marks the end of lent, which of course means I can have Easter candy tomorrow!... in the spirit of lent and Easter, I just had the following conversation with Mike...
Chrissy: would it be wrong to bust out a bag of jelly beans at Mass tomorrow?
Mike: well yeah, you can't do that because you're supposed to fast until you have communion.
Chrissy: but I'm not Catholic, so I can't have communion...
Mike: I don't know how that works, but I'm sure it's the same. and anyway, you would still have to wait until you got outside after Mass. it's not like you can have communion and then pop in a piece of gum.
Chrissy: why not??!
Mike: well for one thing you just committed an act of cannibalism because Catholics believe you're really eating the body of Jesus.
Chrissy: in that case, what if you're just trying to get the taste of human flesh out of your mouth?
Mike: I'm sure fresh breath spray would be ok!
Chrissy: would it be wrong to bust out a bag of jelly beans at Mass tomorrow?
Mike: well yeah, you can't do that because you're supposed to fast until you have communion.
Chrissy: but I'm not Catholic, so I can't have communion...
Mike: I don't know how that works, but I'm sure it's the same. and anyway, you would still have to wait until you got outside after Mass. it's not like you can have communion and then pop in a piece of gum.
Chrissy: why not??!
Mike: well for one thing you just committed an act of cannibalism because Catholics believe you're really eating the body of Jesus.
Chrissy: in that case, what if you're just trying to get the taste of human flesh out of your mouth?
Mike: I'm sure fresh breath spray would be ok!
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
The Mike Stories, Pt. 27
I was watching the new episode of Criminal Minds with Mike, and Emily Prentiss's character died. it prompted the following conversation:
Chrissy: what!! why would they kill her off?
Mike: I don't know!
Chrissy: but she was a main character!!
Mike: I don't know how these things work!
Chrissy: but Mike!...
Mike: I don't know... maybe it's like Survivor
Chrissy: what, like behind the scenes they voted her off the island?
Mike: yeah, who knows!
Chrissy: if you say so
Mike: I'll look on the internet. Maybe they'll say why she's not on the show anymore.
*for Criminal Minds fans, Emily Prentiss isn't really dead. you'll just have to watch that episode to find out what actually happened.
Chrissy: what!! why would they kill her off?
Mike: I don't know!
Chrissy: but she was a main character!!
Mike: I don't know how these things work!
Chrissy: but Mike!...
Mike: I don't know... maybe it's like Survivor
Chrissy: what, like behind the scenes they voted her off the island?
Mike: yeah, who knows!
Chrissy: if you say so
Mike: I'll look on the internet. Maybe they'll say why she's not on the show anymore.
*for Criminal Minds fans, Emily Prentiss isn't really dead. you'll just have to watch that episode to find out what actually happened.
Monday, February 28, 2011
The Mike Stories, Pt. 26
We just saw a commercial for the news (which is coming on in about 5 minutes), promising an upcoming story about a dozen or so middle schoolers who were expelled for holding Fight Club in the bathrooms. It also promised an exclusive on why parents are angry about how the school handled it....
to which I replied with a nasty "oh I'm sure they are too - schools just can't win. we're always evil and wrong - how about holding the stupid kids accountable for their poor choices?"
and Mike says: "I know! Everyone knows the first rule of Fight Club is you don't talk about Fight Club! duh!"
***
two minutes later:
Me: Mike, I think you have set a record.
Mike: for what?
Me: For how many Mike Stories you can cause me to post in a single day. So far you're up to 3.
Mike: You're funny, Chrissy!
Me: No, you're funny, and you're on a roll tonight!
to which I replied with a nasty "oh I'm sure they are too - schools just can't win. we're always evil and wrong - how about holding the stupid kids accountable for their poor choices?"
and Mike says: "I know! Everyone knows the first rule of Fight Club is you don't talk about Fight Club! duh!"
***
two minutes later:
Me: Mike, I think you have set a record.
Mike: for what?
Me: For how many Mike Stories you can cause me to post in a single day. So far you're up to 3.
Mike: You're funny, Chrissy!
Me: No, you're funny, and you're on a roll tonight!
The Mike Stories, Pt. 25
Mike is really on a roll today!
He is currently in the front room attempting to re-cover this old chair of mine. it's a chair that I "stole" ages ago from a shared house where I lived back in my college days. it had been there since before I moved in... and one by one all of the roommates who pre-dated me moved out, yet the chair was still there. I always liked the chair, and since it had become owner-less, it didn't seem like it would be much of a bother to anyone if I took it with me. (no one ever complained).
Mike has never re-covered a chair before, so this is a giant experiment. the chair is probably at least as old as I am, and had a pretty war torn look to it, so when Mike suggested giving this a try, I didn't imagine that the poor thing could look much worse. I was just reminding him, though, that if my chair looks like a trash heap when he's done, we're getting it professionally re-covered. Mike then told me that there was some structural damage to the chair, and told me it would make more sense to just buy a new chair if it came to that. Nothing dangerous - just nothing worth paying to have professionally re-covered. I must have looked disappointed, because he then assured me that he would do his best to make it look nice in the end.
I told him I would really appreciate it if the chair turned out nice, since I've always liked the chair. it's a comfortable one for curling up and reading a book. My giant bookshelf is right next to it in the front room, and we're planning to get another bookshelf for that area soon - so I told him that if he pulls it off, it'll be like our own little library in there. I told him that I've always wanted my own library, but that I always imagined a spiral staircase leading up to it... to which he replied "me too!!!!"
He then proceeded to tell me how we should alter our front room/dining room space to accommodate a home library that could potentially include a spiral staircase. The actual conversation at this point involved a LOT of pointing, and I will do my best to describe this very visually based conversation legibly. Ready?:
Our front door opens into a small living-room like front room with vaulted ceilings. That space opens directly into the dining room. There is a catwalk-like horizontal beam dividing the two spaces. It's placed at about the right height for an average ceiling. (the cats love to hang out on it).
Mike proposed converting the beam into a ceiling/floor space above the dining room, thus creating an extra room above the dining room. The vaulted ceiling in that area slopes, so that it is about 3 ft higher than the beam at the lowest point, and perhaps 7 or 8 ft higher than the beam at the highest point (keep in mind here that I have dyscalculia, and my estimations here are based solely on my conversation with Mike, and the estimates that he stated - which in all probability are wrong)
I started laughing hysterically at this idea, and asked him what's he going to do? crawl around in his new library up there? He said no, he can stand up at the taller side - so I asked him what's he going to do with the short side? put in bean bag chairs? (he liked that idea very much). Then I proposed converting it into our kid's bedroom so we don't have to give up one of the other rooms when we have a kid. (this was followed by a funny conversation about how we could send the kid to their bedroom when they misbehave at the dinner table, directly below their room.
The light in the dining room, of course, hangs down from the vaulted ceiling. I asked him what's he going to do, put a hole in the floor of his new room to accommodate the light? then you could also look down and stare at unsuspecting guests during dinner.
In the end I pointed out that any future potential buyers probably wouldn't love the strange loft room... but considering that I don't ever want to move, I invited him to do whatever he wants!
He is currently in the front room attempting to re-cover this old chair of mine. it's a chair that I "stole" ages ago from a shared house where I lived back in my college days. it had been there since before I moved in... and one by one all of the roommates who pre-dated me moved out, yet the chair was still there. I always liked the chair, and since it had become owner-less, it didn't seem like it would be much of a bother to anyone if I took it with me. (no one ever complained).
Mike has never re-covered a chair before, so this is a giant experiment. the chair is probably at least as old as I am, and had a pretty war torn look to it, so when Mike suggested giving this a try, I didn't imagine that the poor thing could look much worse. I was just reminding him, though, that if my chair looks like a trash heap when he's done, we're getting it professionally re-covered. Mike then told me that there was some structural damage to the chair, and told me it would make more sense to just buy a new chair if it came to that. Nothing dangerous - just nothing worth paying to have professionally re-covered. I must have looked disappointed, because he then assured me that he would do his best to make it look nice in the end.
I told him I would really appreciate it if the chair turned out nice, since I've always liked the chair. it's a comfortable one for curling up and reading a book. My giant bookshelf is right next to it in the front room, and we're planning to get another bookshelf for that area soon - so I told him that if he pulls it off, it'll be like our own little library in there. I told him that I've always wanted my own library, but that I always imagined a spiral staircase leading up to it... to which he replied "me too!!!!"
He then proceeded to tell me how we should alter our front room/dining room space to accommodate a home library that could potentially include a spiral staircase. The actual conversation at this point involved a LOT of pointing, and I will do my best to describe this very visually based conversation legibly. Ready?:
Our front door opens into a small living-room like front room with vaulted ceilings. That space opens directly into the dining room. There is a catwalk-like horizontal beam dividing the two spaces. It's placed at about the right height for an average ceiling. (the cats love to hang out on it).
Mike proposed converting the beam into a ceiling/floor space above the dining room, thus creating an extra room above the dining room. The vaulted ceiling in that area slopes, so that it is about 3 ft higher than the beam at the lowest point, and perhaps 7 or 8 ft higher than the beam at the highest point (keep in mind here that I have dyscalculia, and my estimations here are based solely on my conversation with Mike, and the estimates that he stated - which in all probability are wrong)
I started laughing hysterically at this idea, and asked him what's he going to do? crawl around in his new library up there? He said no, he can stand up at the taller side - so I asked him what's he going to do with the short side? put in bean bag chairs? (he liked that idea very much). Then I proposed converting it into our kid's bedroom so we don't have to give up one of the other rooms when we have a kid. (this was followed by a funny conversation about how we could send the kid to their bedroom when they misbehave at the dinner table, directly below their room.
The light in the dining room, of course, hangs down from the vaulted ceiling. I asked him what's he going to do, put a hole in the floor of his new room to accommodate the light? then you could also look down and stare at unsuspecting guests during dinner.
In the end I pointed out that any future potential buyers probably wouldn't love the strange loft room... but considering that I don't ever want to move, I invited him to do whatever he wants!
The Mike Stories, Pt. 24
Me: I'm hungry. What should we have for dinner? I have another frozen pizza in there...
Mike: eh. (accompanied by a disappointed look)
Me: You don't seem happy about that?
Mike: I'm trying to eat healthy, remember?
Me: Great! You're turn then - what's for dinner??
Mike: hmph! FROZEN PIZZA!
Me: (laughing) That's going in the Mike Stories!
Mike: (also laughing) You're funny!
Me: No - YOU'RE funny!!
(after several minutes)
Mike: so, I bought a shower curtain liner for the upstairs bathroom... because it's been like 2 years (he means the guest room bathroom that we rarely use)
Me: cool
Mike: so we can get an outer one in any color
Me: get like a fabric one you mean?
Mike: yeah, so I was thinking if it's just an outer one and it's fabric, that wouldn't be that hard because it's basically like a sheet...
Me: you mean make it? because I'm not sewing anything.
Mike: oh. yeah, well we can buy it too....
Me: does this need to go in the Mike Stories too?
Mike: (gives me a look like he's trying to fight the urge to say yes) ;)
**the above conversation is an excellent example of how Mike starts explaining things from somewhere in the middle, and I get to try to read his mind.
Mike: eh. (accompanied by a disappointed look)
Me: You don't seem happy about that?
Mike: I'm trying to eat healthy, remember?
Me: Great! You're turn then - what's for dinner??
Mike: hmph! FROZEN PIZZA!
Me: (laughing) That's going in the Mike Stories!
Mike: (also laughing) You're funny!
Me: No - YOU'RE funny!!
(after several minutes)
Mike: so, I bought a shower curtain liner for the upstairs bathroom... because it's been like 2 years (he means the guest room bathroom that we rarely use)
Me: cool
Mike: so we can get an outer one in any color
Me: get like a fabric one you mean?
Mike: yeah, so I was thinking if it's just an outer one and it's fabric, that wouldn't be that hard because it's basically like a sheet...
Me: you mean make it? because I'm not sewing anything.
Mike: oh. yeah, well we can buy it too....
Me: does this need to go in the Mike Stories too?
Mike: (gives me a look like he's trying to fight the urge to say yes) ;)
**the above conversation is an excellent example of how Mike starts explaining things from somewhere in the middle, and I get to try to read his mind.
Saturday, January 22, 2011
The Mike Stories, Pt. 23
Last weekend I came downstairs after a nice morning of sleeping in, and was just on my way to the kitchen to get breakfast - when I ran into Mike. He was just standing there in his bathrobe with two hand weights. That's it. He was just standing there with Morpheus, not doing anything. When I asked him what he was doing, he said he didn't know. When I told him he was a strange man - he responded with "maybe you should take a picture" - and so I did. Here it is (enjoy):
A couple of nights ago Mike and I were upstairs getting ready for bed, and he seemed quite proud of himself when he asked me if I had been online lately. I hesitantly told him that I had, but that I had no idea what he was so proud of himself for, and that considering the internet is a rather large place - he'd have to narrow it down a bit for me.
Then he asked if I had seen his twitter postings. I told him that I had not, and asked what he had posted. He told me he had posted a bunch of stuff, and that I should go read them. I told him that my computer was downstairs, and that I didn't feel like going down just for that, since I was on my way to bed. He seemed very anxious for me to see it, and so I told him maybe HE should go downstairs and get a laptop so he could pull it up for me. And so then he pulls out his laptop from right under the bed and starts looking it up.
At that point, I noticed his browser was in Spanish - so I asked him about that, and he said he had set it up that way. I think Spanish Mike is slowly taking over, and before I know it, I'm going to have an exclusively Spanish husband. At least he'll come in handy if we make it down to Costa Rica in March.
So then he finally gets his twitter page up, and he can't figure out how to navigate it. He started in complaining about how it didn't work right and was hard to navigate. I snatched the laptop away from him and found what he was trying to show me in about 2 clicks. (He thought I was a genius - to which I told him he just needed better reasoning skills).
And what was the big mysterious thing he was so proud of, you wonder? He had discovered that he could use voice recognition technology on his phone to produce tweets, and he had been tweeting all the way home during his commute. He even tweeted two photos, and after seeing them I told him that he should not be allowed to drive if he was just going to focus his attention on tweeting and taking photos instead of watching the road. Want to see it for yourself? The date in question was Jan 19th. (I find it best to back up to the first post of a particular day, and read up rather than down, so you can see the chronological progression of his insanity)
Friday, January 14, 2011
The Mike Stories, Pt. 22
Mike pulled most of the shelving out of the pantry....
And finally, here he is coming back up from the creepy underground. and yes, that is a head lamp my nerdy husband is wearing. :)
Mike claims he was down there doing some task related to turning off the electricity flowing to power outlets that were in the deck that he recently pulled out of the back yard. but lets face it - he probably just wanted to play around under he house & screw around with the nicely organized pantry.
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